Help

Hi there,

First I was happy to hear that things are working out for you and your family. I'm not very good about calling but please know that I'm sending my love and healing energy your way whenever you come to mind.

The second thing I want to say is - ALL IS WELL. Way better than you and I can possibly imagine. While I appreciate you thinking of me as a positive support for your loved one, one thing that I know about myself is that I'm not much of a manager. In fact, I kind of stink at it.

What I can do that may be helpful is to take what you shared with me today and help invert/make neutral everything that does not support your overall wellbeing (as observed by the unified field.) Not sure if you believe in soul contracts, but I'm learning that it's a thing. And what feels problematic about any given situation is all in how we look at it.

When I referenced how it's common for people to unconsciously experience re-enactments of their past, it's how I've come to explain what I used to think was super odd or puzzling behavior that I was seeing with clients and family members.) It's like the person can't help but be triggered and see and experience us as the source of their pain.

Love vs. Fear

(Zukov's External vs. Authentic Power)

At its base, everything we do or say is motivated by one or the other. I was just talking to my Japanese friend this morning about Gary Zukov and the way he helps us conceptualize the two motivational drives as it relates to relationships and what you were talking about today.

Have you ever watched someone in a fear spiral or loop. It's like they're swept up in a whirlpool and they have zero access to a more compassionate and empowered way of being. Demonstrating a pattern of being in one or the other has to do with levels of consciousness, we're not able to use logic (talking to them) to bring about change. But we can absolutely choose how we want to show up for ourselves and others in any given situation.

What my friend and I came to is that when we feel like we're in a bind (and not sure how to move forward) acting from self-compassion seems to be the key. This can seem counterintuitive because quite often it can feel risky (even selfish.) Considering that we can't control the well-being of loved ones or anyone for that matter - no matter we strive to meet their expectations. Sometimes the best (most compassioante) thing that we can offer is to STOP CARING. (Yes - you may have to draw on everying you have learned about being mindfulness to be able to pivot and do this.)

From there, continue to tune into (and care about) how you feel. And then? See if you can reach for the next thing that feels good.

***

Sorry that was a bit longer than intended. I started writing wanting simply to relay to you that all is well (that you are most definitely a good enough son) and I'm going to trust you will take away whatever might be helpful.

As far as my practice, there is change coming and things are still brewing. If you're around, it would be good for us to meet up. I will let you know as things unfold.

Take care and keep me posted as well!

In harmony,

Joy